Dating someone with herpes dating columnist julia

I've gotten better as I've gotten older, but I've tried to be careful to protect myself. Most of the data I've read indicate somewhere around 2% per year from female to male with regular condom use.

Yesterday, my girlfriend received test results from her gyno appointment. We've been dating for 5 months, probably have sex about 3 times a week on average. I believe her when she says she didn't know she had it, else why come clean now.

Why the heck would I want to risk having to mess with cootchie sores for the rest of my life? She has been married for 20 years, and with her husband for years before that.

They are careful during outbreaks, which she can always feel coming on, and her husband has not gotten herpes in all those years.

The stigma of the virus, which exists at the heart of this faulty mindset, is usually worse than the symptoms themselves, as it affects dating, social life and psychological health.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, about one out of six people in the United States aged 14 to 49 have genital herpes caused by the HSV-2 infection (the herpes simplex virus often responsible for genital herpes).

I'm also getting tested myself again just to check that I'm not already HSV2 positive - again I understand the national statistics of 25% incidence and there is a good chance I have it and don't know about it. but it doesn't help me create a good decision framework for the question, 'do I continue seeing her or not'. For the next 3 days while I'm waiting for my own test results, I'm not likely to share this decision framework with her. So taking a chance on her now might not work out very well for me in the long term if this relationship doesn't pan out (and I'm unlucky and catch it -but considering our chemistry, I expect there will be significantly above average freqency of sexual contact...). Do I go with the bird in hand, or move on (and hurt a decent person in the process)...

Keep in mind that s/he was saying that herpes is not a big deal in comparison to HIV which is most definitely a huge deal. For the purposes of the poll let's say that they have a minor case (not too disgusting, visually) but obviously with a risk of infecting others. But being willing to date someone isn't the same thing as making a lifetime commitment.

Even after his friends hype him up, Jamin Peckham still backs out sometimes.

It’s not that he’s shy or insecure about his looks.

She apparently requested a full battery of tests, to try and fully ease my mind as we discussed my worries in the past and she was confident she didn't have anything.

Finding out down the road that their partners has herpes.

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